Psalm 19:12-14
Who can discern his errors?
Declare me innocent from hidden faults.
Keep back your servant also from presumptuous sins;
let them not have dominion over me!
Then I shall be blameless,
and innocent of great transgression.
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
be acceptable in your sight,
O LORD, my rock and my redeemer.
...............
I once had a roommate who noticed something about me and told me about it (sounds like a roommate, right?). He told me that I seemed to struggle with guilt over sins that I hadn't even committed. I was always questioning myself, hoping that my introspection would reveal some hidden corner of my life that contained some sinful thought or deed. Further, I would sometimes just assume that I was sinning in some way, without even having a specific insistence I could put my finger on.
My roommate told me that such an attitude was actually not portraying much confidence in God's ability to convict me of sin. In other words: "Don't you trust God enough to let him do His job - to convict you of hidden sin? If you know you have committed a sin, just repent and pray and turn to Christ; If not, then stop worrying about it." Boy, did I need that kick in the pants. And, Psalm 19 gives us a wonderful example of David's trust in the God who faithfully guides and convicts his children.
Verses 1-11 describe how God has revealed himself and his expectations - first through the natural world, then also through his written word. The natural world "pours" forth speech concerning the majesty and holiness and creativity of God. The written word reveals the specific nature of God and guides his children in everything pertaining to life and godliness (cf. 1 Tim. 3:16-17; 2 Pet. 1:3-4). In other words, it's God's job to reveal himself and his character. He is more trustworthy than anyone to let us know what He expects of us.
The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of this law (Deut. 29:29).
This is challenging and encouraging. It is challenging because we naturally cringe at many of God's clear expectations and commands in Scripture. Carrying our cross, imitating God incarnate, laying down our lives, praying without ceasing, preaching the word, loving our enemies - these are not always so convenient in a fallen world that considers the cross of Christ to be foolishness.
But, Psalm 19 is also encouraging, especially for those prone to unhealthy introspection. David considers first the clarity of God's self-revelation in nature and in Scripture, then what does he do? He prays to God to convict him of hidden sin and save him from presumptuous thinking. He also is concerned about the thoughts and meditations of his heart, which are potentially sinful and corrupt. But, I believe David's prayer reflects a heart that trusts God to do his work of penetration and conviction (cf. Heb. 4:12). Therefore, if God is silent and does not bring any of our hidden sins to light, then guess what? There's nothing there to worry about.
At least, not for right now.
(I have a feeling that there may always be more hidden sin in us while we live this fallen life, but God, in his mercy, only reveals it to us in manageable portions, so that we do not despair, but continue to trust in the transforming Spirit of Christ, who will not rest until he has conformed us to his image. See Romans 8:28-29)
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