Do You Love Me?

John 21:15‭-‬17

When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?" He said to him, "Yes, Lord; you know that I love you." He said to him, "Feed my lambs."  He said to him a second time, "Simon, son of John, do you love me?" He said to him, "Yes, Lord; you know that I love you." He said to him, "Tend my sheep."  He said to him the third time, "Simon, son of John, do you love me?" Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time, "Do you love me?" and he said to him, "Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you." Jesus said to him, "Feed my sheep."

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We live in a unique time in Christian history when it comes to Bible translations. At the turn of the 21st century, there are about 900 English translations of Scripture, most of these having emerged in the last 200 years of scholarship and manuscript study. You can access dozens of these for free online or using some form of Bible software. And with all this effort to learn the original Hebrew and Greek languages, it can be tempting to think that only a language scholar can know what the Bible really says.

As someone who has spent some time learning Hebrew, I can tell you that there are indeed some powerful insights that can come through doing word studies and trying to grasp what these words meant in their ancient context. But I can also say with confidence that your English translation will give you 99% of the original meaning and that there are abundant footnotes and commentaries that can supplement the few concepts that are lost in translation.

John 21 is a great example of this dynamic. The conclusion to John's gospel has a clear focus, dramatic imagery, and compelling emotion in the characters and dialogue. Jesus makes another post-resurrection appearance, multiplying a catch of fish and welcoming his friends to a lakeside barbeque. Following the responses of Mary Magdalene and Thomas, we now see the emotional response of Peter, perhaps Jesus' closest and most trusted friend.

Peter is clearly excited to see Jesus again. He jumped out of the boat to get to him! But then Jesus asks him a question that we must all come to terms with:

Do you love me?

Peter answers quickly. Of course I love you, I'm thrilled to see you alive again! Jesus charges him to feed his sheep. But then Jesus asks again.

Do you love me?

Peter answers again, maybe a little hesitant this time. Why is he asking again? Yes, I love you. And Jesus charges him again to shepherd his sheep. But then Jesus asks a third time.

Do you love me?

At this point, John diverts from the pattern and tells us that Peter is grieved. Why is Peter grieved?

This is where some would say that knowing the Greek words for "love" provides a deeper understanding of this passage. Jesus uses "agapao" in his first two questions, and this word is often used for sacrificial love. In contrast, Peter replies with "phileo," which often signifies brotherly love. In the third question, Jesus matches Peter and uses "phileo." And that is when Peter is grieved. But why?

Several interpreters have tried to insist that Peter was grieved by Jesus' change in wording, as if Jesus is confronting Peter's lack of sacrifice. That seems to fit the recent context, where Peter had just denied Jesus rather than face punishment for knowing him. Maybe Jesus is just putting him in his place.

But there is another interpretation that better fits the character of Jesus, and it doesn't require knowing Greek. It just requires counting to three. It is more likely that Peter is grieved, not because the word choice, but because of the three times Jesus says it. He is grieved because this mirrors the three times that Peter denied him. All the shame is hiding just under the surface.

But Jesus' goal is not shame. It is restoration. For each question there is a charge. And that charge is for Peter to rise to a privileged place of leadership in the church that Jesus would soon establish. He needed a leader who could feed and nourish a weak fellowship into a strong Spirit-filled movement which would go on to turn the world upsidedown. And Peter was the man for the job.

So the question remains for us today. Are we ready to move past our grief and shame, even if we've betrayed Jesus time and again? Are we ready to receive the power of the Holy Spirit and proclaim the resurrected Jesus? Are we prepared to bear our cross today?

Do you love me?

A King and His Bride

Psalms 45:6-7

Your throne, O God, is forever and ever.
The scepter of your kingdom is a scepter of uprightness;
you have loved righteousness and hated wickedness.
Therefore God, your God, has anointed you
with the oil of gladness beyond your companions

...............

This chapter stands out in the Psalms for several reasons. The first and most obvious is that this song is not primarily directed to God. We have gotten used to these prayers and petitions addressing God directly, and then we are greeted with this romantic love song about a king and his bride. Why is it here and what does it mean for us?

Surely we can relate to a love song. Our culture today is filled with pop radio hits which linger on the emotional and physical details of lovers. We are built for relationship and every culture and people have given voice to their love through song. The Hebrews were no exception.

This Psalm first addresses Israel's king. The writer gushes with admiration for this mighty leader. What strikes me most is that the king is praised for both his meekness and his military strength, for both loving righteousness and hating wickedness. The takeaway: a good leader and a good government is marked by this twofold character. That every act of strength against an enemy must have a heart of love and righteousness behind it.

The second half of the psalm addresses the king's bride. She is encouraged to leave her family and commit herself completely to him. Her clothing and her companions are described in turn, rich adornments for her beauty. Like the king, the emphasis is on how blessed and how glad she must be. This is a celebration of the bride and their committed relationship.

As we've seen throughout the Psalms, while there is a clear meaning rooted in the writer's own time and place, there is also a secondary reference to our own Messiah and King: Jesus. I can say that with confidence because verses 6-7 are quoted directly by the author of the letter to the Hebrews hundreds of years later (Heb. 1:8-9). The New Testament writer used this Psalm along with several other passages to highlight Jesus' authority, power, and worth above all angels or earthly powers. His kingship is the government par excellence, taking the characteristics that the psalmist praised to the ultimate degree.

Likewise we can project the praises for the bride onto the ultimate bride of Christ, the Church. For what is the image that the book of Revelation uses to picture the final culmination of redemption history? A wedding! A great feast where our bridegroom finally reunites with the lover he purchased with his own blood. May we learn to revel in this cerebration and marvel at his grace and majesty.

Then I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder, crying out,

"Hallelujah!
For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns.
Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory,
for the marriage of the Lamb has come,
and his Bride has made herself ready;
it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure"—

for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.
And the angel said to me, "Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb." And he said to me, "These are the true words of God."
(Revelation 19:6‭-‬9)

My Story

This is my story. My story is about how Jesus rescued me and how my heart and later my mind came to really believe that.

In November 1998, I was 16 years old and I was spiraling toward ruin. I remember my time in middle school and high school vividly. I remember being lonely. I remember craving relationship and not knowing how to fill that vacuum. I remember the crushes. I remember nights lying in bed crying and not even knowing why I was alive.

I was a good student. I was a class clown. I had friends. I was successful on the outside, but there was darkness within.

But one night, a friend invited me to church and everything changed.

I saw people singing about Jesus and I felt something powerful happen. I heard that Jesus died for me. I experienced the presence of God, an awareness that something supernatural did exist and could be present in my life. And my friend's mom prayed with me right there to accept Jesus as my Savior.

I remember driving home just filled with energy! I had met God and I knew things were different now. I was not alone.

And life was different. I made Christian friends. The church's youth pastor stuck a bass guitar in my hand and gave me a stack of songs to learn. I learned through new friends and through new music and through hearing God's Word. I was starting to grow.

But then I went to college at Florida State. I started taking classes from professors who criticised Christian faith and treated it as a mere myth among other myths. I began to wonder how I could claim Jesus was the only way. I saw that other religions have community and compassion and music and mystical experiences. Why did I think my experience of God was more true than theirs? My heart had felt God, but my mind was not convinced.

One night, my dorm roommate, who was not a Christian, directly confronted me with these questions. And I didn't have answers. I went to bed not knowing if I'd wake up still believing.

By God's grace, I did not give up. I looked for answers in the Bible. I continued talking with my Christian friends and older members of my church. I read. I studied. I pressed on.

I came to Louisville to attend seminary, still hungry for answers. I learned about the historical validity of the New testament and the verifiable facts supporting Jesus' resurrection. I met several mentors who introduced me not just to apologetic arguments for God's existence, but to the full spectrum of the Christian worldview. I learned why the biblical view of the world is in fact the most intellectually consistent view on every major topic: on the nature of reality, on man's identity and purpose, on how we know what we know, what is the basis for good and evil, why do we perceive beauty and crave a sense of wonder, how can we thrive in our families, our work life, and our community. I started getting answers. My head was catching up to my heart.

Today, I am a product of my past, a finite person who is still hungry for answers and hungry for relationship. I am still a sinner and I still break promises and I still fight the darkness within. But I am also a redeemed sinner. I stand on the fact of Jesus' resurrection. I stand on the fact that my faith and my feelings are now rooted not in myself or anything I can do, but rooted in what He had done for me. These words are my hope and I know nothing can undo it or take it away:

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

Romans 5:8

Hearing, Seeing, Believing

John 20:11, 25

But Mary stood weeping outside the tomb, and as she wept she stooped to look into the tomb...

So the other disciples told him, "We have seen the Lord." But he said to them, "Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe."

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John 20 is about the resurrection of Jesus. But it's also about how we respond and arrive at our own belief in the resurrection. Two characters in particular are highlighted here: Mary Magdalene and Thomas.

Mary's reaction to recent events truly captures the emotional gravity of what has transpired. Facing the empty tomb and thinking that someone had stolen Jesus' body, Mary stood weeping, certainly holding her face with both hands, grieving deeply for this shocking loss.

We can imagine what Mary was feeling as she stood by the tomb. We forget that Jesus' death was such a shock. Just days before, he was welcomed to Jerusalem with shouts of Hosanna. The King, the Messiah had arrived! He taught in the temple courts. He shared a meal with his dearest friends. Despite Jesus' own hints and predictions, the disciples had no idea what was coming.

Processing this shock and grief, Mary stood by the tomb, and the tears came fast and she let them escape freely. He's gone, she thought. He's really gone.

But she looked in the tomb one last time. What did she see? She was met by an unexpected sight indeed. First two angels addressed her. And then she was met by Jesus, though she doesn't recognize him, her grief and despair blinding her. And what do they each in turn say to her? They ask why she is weeping. They comfort her. And then Jesus opens her eyes by calling her by name. She hears this familiar voice she knows so well, calling her personally by name, and she believes.

In contrast to this intimate picture, John 20 next highlights the doubting response of Thomas. Following the encounter with Mary, Jesus appears miraculously in a locked room and presents himself to all the disciples - all except Thomas. Later, when told about this, Thomas is incredulous. He says he will only believe it if he can see and touch Jesus for himself.

Thomas's response is not unlike the objections we hear in our present day and age. When you share the good news of Christ's miraculous resurrection with 21st century Americans, you may find that our post-enlightenment culture refuses to accept any truth-claim that cannot be verified empirically.

There is actually some validity to this cultural intuition. While the Bible describes an open system where divine intervention is real and accepted, there is also an observable order to the natural world where rules of cause and effect are our default expectation. The scientific method was actually built on Christian assumptions, that natural laws implied the existence of a Law-Giver. Generally, we should base our beliefs on observable and verifiable fact, and various Scripture passages support this (cf. Deut. 18:20-22, 1 Cor 15:12-19, 1 Pet 3:15, 1 John 1:1).

But what do we make of John 20:29? Jesus presented his wounds to Thomas. We see the incredible humility of a holy God, who has already left heaven and suffered a criminal's death on our behalf, but is here condescending to the objections of a doubting friend. Jesus complies, proves his divine nature, and rightly receives worship from Thomas in response - he believes and proclaims that Jesus is in fact God the Creator in the flesh. And then, as he often does, Jesus concludes the episode with a word of explanation, and this one is especially pointed to all of us reading about it centuries later.

Jesus said to him, "Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed." (20:29)

Have you believed? Though you cannot hear or see Jesus today, will you be blessed by believing the good news of the resurrection? There are facts and clues upon which to base your faith today. Have you searched the scriptures, passed down faithfully and accurately through the years? Have you trusted the testimonies of dear friends, or listened to the hymns and stories of old? Do you hear the ring of truth in a God who becomes man and suffers in your place? Will you receive this blessing and find life in his name? (20:31). He is calling - how will you respond?

According to Plan

John 19:30

When Jesus had received the sour wine, he said, "It is finished," and he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.

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Jesus died according to plan.

We know this from the first chapter of John, where the writer alludes to his rejection and where John the Baptist calls Jesus the lamb of God. We know this death was planned from Jesus' description of himself as the Good Shepherd who lays down his life for his sheep. We saw in John 17 how Jesus prayed about this plan which was set in place from all eternity. And we know it was planned from how so many scripture passages were fulfilled in such detailed ways. John 19 gives four explicit fulfillments:

1. So they said to one another, "Let us not tear it, but cast lots for it to see whose it shall be." This was to fulfill the Scripture which says, "They divided my garments among them, and for my clothing they cast lots." So the soldiers did these things. (19:24)

2. After this, Jesus, knowing that all was now finished, said (to fulfill the Scripture), "I thirst." (19:28)

3. For these things took place that the Scripture might be fulfilled: "Not one of his bones will be broken."  (19:36)

4. And again another Scripture says, "They will look on him whom they have pierced." (19:37)

Why does it matter that Jesus' death would fulfill these detailed predictions? For one, it is evidence that gives credibility to Jesus' claim to be the Son of God and long-expected Messiah. Jesus had claimed to be older than Abraham. He claimed to speak for God. He claimed to have shared glory with the Father from eternity past. In short, he claimed to be God, and these fulfillments of Scripture are mentioned by John to further prove who Jesus really was. He even says so in verse 35:

He who saw it has borne witness—his testimony is true, and he knows that he is telling the truth—that you also may believe.

John knew that many would find these claims outrageous and that many would accuse the early Christians of believing a lie. So, these Scripture fulfillments matter because they make it hard to claim a coincidence has occurred. The fulfilled prediction of events makes it appear that it was all planned -- and therefore it has real meaning for us.

I think that these fulfillments matter for another reason: they reinforce the feeling that something historic has just been accomplished. When a Scripture is fulfilled hundreds of years after it was written, you know something climactic has occured. This death was the culmination of a much longer story -- the story of man's broken relationship with their Creator. This sense of culmination is underscored by the phrase "it is finished."

What exactly did this death finish? It's honestly not clear from the context. Was Jesus just stating the obvious, that his life is now ended?

No, this means far more than that. The early believers would flesh out the atoning work of Christ in fascinating detail in the other books of the New Testament. In Romans 8, we learn how Christ's death fulfills the law for us. In 2 Corinthians 5, we learn how his death was an exchange that makes us righteous before a holy God. In Hebrews, we learn even more aspects of this finished work and how it atones for us in ways that the priests and sacrifices of old could never do.

In fact, we will spend an eternity pondering the riches of this finished work. There will always be more to understand and appreciate as this work is applied to us personally by faith. Consider the finality of this forgiveness and remember that nothing you do can undo it. It is final and it is complete and it is effective. Live in that freedom and rejoice!

And when before the throne
I stand in him complete
"Jesus died my soul to save"
my lips shall still repeat.

Jesus paid it all!
All to him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
he washed it white as snow.

Slaughtered yet Loved

Psalms 44:20‭-‬23

If we had forgotten the name of our God
or spread out our hands to a foreign god,
would not God discover this?
For he knows the secrets of the heart.
Yet for your sake we are killed all the day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.
Awake! Why are you sleeping, O Lord?
Rouse yourself! Do not reject us forever!

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On first glance, this Psalm appears to be a simple cry for help. The psalmist is clearly in the depths of despair, feeling abandoned by God. There is a familiar pattern we see in many of the laments. The structure of the poem breaks down like this:

A recounting of God's past faithfulness (v. 1-8)
An accusation of God's present rejection (v. 9-22)
A plea for God's future deliverance (v. 23-26)

Granted, no painful crisis is simple, and pleading for God's intervention is not all that simple either. We are reminded again of the importance of remembering God's real intervening actions in times past. We are reminded that great men and women of faith had times of real doubting and even voiced honest accusations in prayer to God. God can handle our honesty, and that is often the path of reflection that reconnects us to our merciful Savior in the midst of deep pain. He empathizes with our weakness and temptations because he too bore them in Christ.

But compared to other Psalms, this does not appear to break new ground or reveal anything new about who God is or what he has accomplished. That is, until you recognize how this Psalm is quoted by Paul in Romans 8. Let's focus there for a moment:

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written,

"For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered."

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:35‭-‬39)

This passage in Romans is one of the richest promises in all of Scripture. The assurance and permanence of the love of Christ is described with absolute certainty, no matter the circumstance. And here we find that the more we grasp the depths of Psalm 44, the more rich and relieving this promise becomes.

That must have been Paul's intention. His Jewish audience should have been familiar with this painful Psalm and the emotions it would invoke. And despite the sense of rejection the persecuted Roman Christians felt, God had not fallen asleep or forgotten his precious children. Nothing, absolutely nothing in all creation, could separate them from the love of God now fully revealed in the finished work of Christ.

Lord, help me to bring my crisis to you in honest prayer. I am weak and short-sighted. Help me to see and believe that you remain faithful even in this hard time. And I know this is true because you have offered your Son who has conquered death and now lives in me. All I have and all I will ever need is found in you:

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? (Romans 8:31‭-‬32)

The Upsidedown Kingdom

John 18:36‭-‬38

Jesus answered, "My kingdom is not of this world. If my kingdom were of this world, my servants would have been fighting, that I might not be delivered over to the Jews. But my kingdom is not from the world."  Then Pilate said to him, "So you are a king?" Jesus answered, "You say that I am a king. For this purpose I was born and for this purpose I have come into the world—to bear witness to the truth. Everyone who is of the truth listens to my voice."  Pilate said to him, "What is truth?" After he had said this, he went back outside to the Jews and told them, "I find no guilt in him."

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The Creator has been put in chains. Our Maker has been betrayed by his closest friends. The King of the universe stands humiliated before the governors of men. Moments before, he was describing the glory he shared with the Father before the world began. Now, he is condemned by a kangaroo court and rejected by a crowd who preferred a known murderer. What does he say in his defense?

My kingdom is not of this world.

As we have seen time and again, the Gospels portray a Savior who is not what we expected. From his humble birth by an unwed teenager, to his obscure upbringing in Nazareth, to his ministry of parables and dining with sinners -- this is not the Davidic Messiah that they were hoping for.

John 18 brings this upsidedown narrative to its climax. Clearly Peter thought that striking the high priest's servant with a sword was fitting with Jesus' mission. The disciples had lived through decades of government oppression, unable to worship and govern themselves freely. Other zealots and insurrectionists had come and gone, offering a rebel's hope against the monolithic Roman empire. And Jesus had proven his supernatural power before their very eyes. Surely he would turn that power against the injustice of Rome and free Israel once and for all!

But this hope was false and it shows how our biases can deceive us, even when the truth is explained over and over.

No, the kingdom of Jesus would not come through violent force, but through a humble sacrifice. Our Darwinian intuition, that might makes right, had blinded us to the beauty of a better way. What we really needed, more than a political Savior, was the forgiveness and new heart that only a resurrected Jesus could offer. Our sights were set too low -- why would Jesus defeat one Roman ruler when he had the power to destroy death itself for all time and open up eternal life to any one who believes in him?

What does this mean for us today? Even for those who know and love this upsidedown gospel message, are we quick to put our trust in political promises? Or even more likely, do we forget to turn the other cheek, and instead hold a grudge or take revenge on others in small subtle ways? Each day we are offered choices between the way of the Cross and the way of the world. If our King was willing to swallow his pride and take a hit for us, surely we should expect to do the same. He even promised it would be so.

Lord, give me grace today to be more like Jesus. Help me to love even my enemies who are right now working to hurt and ruin me. Let me be a faithful citizen of that kingdom which is not of this world.